What I Know For Sure

I wish I could take credit for the following, but I can't. It belongs to Oprah Winfrey. This article comes from her 2002 O Magazine. As you may, may not know Oprah ends each of her issues with an article entitled What I Know for Sure. This article in particular had a major impact on me. So here goes:

"The first time Tina Turner appeared on my show I wanted to run away with her, be a back up girl, and dance all night on stage. (As any gay guy would want as well I might add). Well that dream came true one night in L.A. when the show went on tour with Tina. After a full day's rehearsal for just one song, I got my chance. It was the most nerve-racking, knee-shaking, exhilarating experience for me. For five minutes and 27 seconds I got a chance to feel what it's like to rock onstage. I have never been more out of my element, out of my body. I remember counting the steps in my head, trying to keep the rhythm, waiting for the big kick, and being so self-conscious. Then, in an instant, it dawned on me: Okay girl, this is going to be over soon. And if I didn't loosen up, I would miss the fun of it. So I threw my head back, forgot abut step, step, turn, kick, and I just danced. WHEEEEW! was that fun.

Several months later I received a package from my friend and mentor Maya Angelou - she'd said she was sending me a gift she'd want any daughter of hers to have. When I opened it, I found a CD with a song by Lee Ann Womack that I can still hardly listen to without boohooing. The song, which is a testament to Maya's life, has this line as its refrain: When you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.

What I know for sure is that every day brings a chance for you to draw a breath, kick off your shows, and step out and dance - to live free of regret and filled with as much joy, fun, and laughter as you can stand. You can either waltz boldly onto the floor of life and live the way you know your spirit is nudging you to, or you can sit quietly by the wall, receding in the shadows of fear and self-doubt. You have the choice this very moment - the only moment you have for certain. Are you dancing in the light or languishing in the dark? If your life ended tomorrow, what would you regret not doing? If this were the last day of your life would you spend it the way you're spending it today ? When was the last time you laughed with your girlfriend till your sides hurt or dropped the kids off with a sitter and went away for an entire weekend?

I once passed a billboard that caught my attention. It read HE WHO DIES WITH THE MOST TOYS IS STILL DEAD. Anyone who has ever come close to death can tell you that at the end of your life, you probably won't be reminiscing about how many all-nighters you pulled at the office or how much your mutual fund is worth. The thoughts that linger are the "only if" questions, like Who could I have become if I had only done the things I always wanted to do?

The gift of deciding to face your mortality without turning away or flinching is the gift of recognizing that because you will die, you must live now. Whether you flounder or flourish is always in your hands - you are the single biggest influence in your life. And your journey begins with a choice to get up, step out and live fully.

I (and me too) hope you (none of us) don't get so wrapped up in nonessential stuff this summer that you forget to enjoy yourself - because this moment is about to be over. I hope you'll look back and remember this season as the time when you decided to make every one of your moments count, to relish each day as if there would never be another. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.

And so it goes.